Complete
by technofever
Summary: Bella's wedding is coming up soon and out of pure exhaustion she falls asleep waiting for Edward. She wakes up after an unusual dreamless night, feeling an overpowering sense of déja vu.


**A/N: This takes place after the first chapter of Breaking Dawn, when Alice makes Bella try on her dress.  
****(a picture of the dress & edwards little gift to her on my profile) **

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns  
**

I finally opened my eyes, regretting leaving my happy place, but instead found an equally amusing smile on my soon to be sister's face.

"What?" Even though I knew what she was smiling about.

"Just turn around" she said while looking over my shoulder, and if it were possible, her smile grew even bigger.

I hesitated to turn around knowing that alice had probably gone overboard with my dress, and wondering if I could ever look atleast half the standards that Edward deserved. But I also saw how happy this made Alice and probably Edward too, if he were here. So, slowly and steadily enough for my own good, I bent my head and turned around, hoping I wouldn't step on the fabric or even worse, look like a clown in this dress.

With one quick glance from underneath my eyelashes, I saw my reflection. Shock coursed through my body, so I raised my head all the way giving myself a full look-over. Was this really me ? It couldn't be. She was beautiful and glowing. I felt the tears begin to form in the corner of my eye and noticed that Alice hadn't said anything yet since I've taken in my appearance.

Taking in my reaction, Alice scrunched up her features, showing concern in her eyes.

"It's beautiful, Alice" I managed to whisper.

"WHEWW.." she exhaled an involuntary breath, and smiled "For a minute, I thought my vision was going to be wrong."

I twirled around slowly to get the full view of my dress. It was truly a vision. Simple and elegant, with no straps and a few designs trailing on the left side of my dress. I was so surprised because Alice and I had fussed so many times over my dress making sure that she wouldn't make it too extravagant, but she would always chuckle and roll her eyes saying "not going to happen".

Then I realized as I was twirling, something shined in the light.

I reached down to touch the hollow of my neck.

"Edward wanted me to give that to you to match your bracelet" Alice said, noticing my gesture

It was the exact same heart that was placed on my bracelet except it hung on a silver chain around my neck.

"Thanks Alice" I reached over and embraced her little pixie body. She squeezed me tight for a few seconds, obviously satisfied with my reaction, but let go quickly.

"Ok, let's remove this before Edward even gets a chance to see it on your wedding day." she chuckled

After removing the slip and slide dress, I looked over to the alarm clock beside my bed. 8:35. Did that many hours already pass?

I turned to Alice who was already zipping up the white bag and prancing towards me to remove my necklace

"Do you know if Edward will be coming here soon ?" I asked, bending slightly so she could reach my neck

"Yup, he just about finished hunting he'll be here around 10:00. " she informed me.

Ugh. These long hours I had to be seperated from Edward were unbearable, I know it was selfish of me but I also knew it was essential that he hunted, especially with our wedding coming around the corner.

"I'm just going to go bring this home before Edward arrives there so he doesn't see it, bye Bella!" she chimed as she skipped down the hallway

I suddenly felt very exhausted from this whole week with all the wedding talks and procedures so I quickly took my toiletries from my desk and went to the bathroom to fix up before Edward came, so there would be no interruptions.

"Good night Charlie!" I called from upstairs

"Good night" I heard him answer from the living room

I went to my brand new stereo that Edward had forcefully bought for me because I was 'lacking in electronics ' , but thankfully for tonight it came in good use. I pressed play, only to be swept away by the lullaby he had composed for me so long ago but still had the same effect on me.

I lyed down on my bed thinking about Edward, and how I would soon be a part of his family--_my_ family. I quickly thought about Jacob and how he was doing, wherever he was right now. I remembered my conversation with Seth, and was relieved to know that atleast Jacob was still alive, but the fact that he thought I was capable of skipping off into the sunset and forgetting him completely angered me a bit. I thought more about my wedding and looking over to the empty seat where my best friend should have been, until my eyes started drooping, my mind losing consciousness, and the last thing I heard was a light breeze blow through my window.

--

Before I even opened my eyes, I felt an unusual sunlight peer through the window and onto my face. I didn't remember falling asleep, but I guess I was so exhausted because I hadn't even dreamt at all last night. I was hoping it was one of those rare sunny days here in forks today, so that Edward and I could go visit the meadow. _Edward_.

My eyes shot open remembering that I didn't even stay awake to wait for Edward. The sun was so bright that it blocked my vision for a little bit, until i sat up and cleared my vision with the back of my hand.

Something was unfamiliar though. Where was I ? I wasn't in my room anymore, and where was Edward? This wasn't my bed, because I definately don't remember Edward giving me a king sized bed for my room. I knew for a fact that this wasn't Edward's room either, there were no cds in the corner and the room wasn't filled with the same old comforting scent that his usually had. I looked around once more and got out of bed. I looked down to see that I was wearing a white sun dress that went to above my knees. I recalled falling asleep in my favourite sweats and my white t-shirt.

Was this another one of Edward's surprises? I hated his surprises, but if it made him happy I would go along with it. I walked down the unfamiliar hallway, hoping to find Edward but passed another room. Nobody was in there, but the room was painted yellow with a small bed in the corner and a doll sitting on top.

I kept walking and saw another room down the hall, but decided againsts it to check inside. I trotted down the stairs trying not to trip, and came into a living room. I heard voices coming from my left so I followed it. It was coming from outside. I passed through a kitchen and saw that the door to the backyard was open.

By now, I was frustrated not knowing where I was and eager to find my Edward. I went outside on the porch to find an open area where the grass never ended. To my left of the porch was a white swinging chair, but nobody in it.

I heard giggling and I saw two little kids playing on a little playground a few yards away in front of me. It was a girl and a boy. The little girl looked in the direction of the house where I was standing on the porch and startled me with what she said " Hey Mommy! "

Obviously this child wasn't talking to me, and I wasn't even sure where I was or who's house I was in, so I turned around to see who her mommy was. Nobody was there. I probably heard wrong. I walked towards the little children, hoping to find out where in the world I could be. I got closer and noticed that these two children had the most beautiful skin I have ever seen. It was a light tan and they both had matching brown eyes and brown hair. They looked very familiar, like someone I had known long ago, but I quickly pushed that thought out of the way, so I could figure out what I was doing here.

"Do you happen to know where Edward is?" I asked in my most kindest voice

The two looked at eachother and started giggling while the little girl made her way, coming down from the playground.

"Who's Edward?" the little girl asked with a smile, and ran back to her previous spot on the playground

Great. I looked to the boy.

The boy just smiled at me and stared into my eyes as if he knew who I was, and put his hand to his head and scratched it. It was the cutest gesture a child could have done, but for some reason I couldn't scratch the feeling that something was wrong here.

I walked back towards the house to possibly wait for Edward to come out of his hiding spot and surprise me. I sat on the swinging chair just watching the two little children interact with eachother in the brotherly sisterly love, giggling and laughing away, without a care in the world. I couldn't help but feel like this was deja vu, or maybe it would have been a perfect life if I hadn't already chosen the perfect life with Edward. No, Edward was my everything. Nothing could be more perfect than that.

I heard some movement coming from inside the house, but I decided to keep staring ahead of me so I wouldn't give in so easily to that smoldering look Edward gave me after every surprise. I knew he had stepped out of the house and onto the porch because there was a creak in the wood. I looked away, towards the vast lands of grass that spread for miles, when he sat beside me on the swinging chair. The sun began to heat me up more, now that I remembered it was there. But when I heard him speak, I realized now that it wasn't the sun that was heating me up.

"Goodmorning Bella"

I whipped my head around. Jake.

My face showed my shock as I just sat there with my mouth slightly open and my brows furrowed together. My bestfriend. He looked the same, but his features looked older. Somehow, he didn't look like the Jake I knew before he left.

"Jake?" he laughed at my obviousness

I shook my head to clear it. "What are you doing here?"

His smile went away, and a look of concern flashed on his face. I quickly regretted it.

" I mean.."

"You don't want me here?" he asked, his face lighting up a bit, but still showing that hint of concern

"No, I missed you.. I missed you a lot" I hugged him but quickly let go, so that he knew where we still stood.

" I was always here Bella, you're not making any sense.. what did you mean you missed me a lot?" he actually looked confused.

I looked towards the little children remembering they were there. I looked back to Jake. I knew I was going to regret this when I mentioned his name to Jacob, but I was really growing impatient.

"Where am I? Where's Edward?" I could see my reflection through his eyes, and I looked really confused. And I was. I also saw that my words had hit him like a brick.

"Bella...I thought you made that decision long ago, when you decided..." he trailed off

"Jake, this is NOT funny " I couldn't hold it in anymore, " Bring me home right now."

"You are home." was all he could respond with. Was he trying to scare me? It was working.

I just kept staring. The tears were threatening to spill over, and I was too weak to hold them in anymore, so I just let them go freely towards my cheeks.

I had to look away. Why was he doing this to me, this wasn't my home. Why couldn't he just accept that I love Edward. I certainly remember him telling me that he wasn't going to force me anymore, was he going back on his word? I was ready to confront him about that but then the little girl called out in my direction again.

"Mommy! come play with us!" once again, who was this little girl's mommy, why was I mistaken for her?

I turned to Jake and whispered with a hint of frustration in my tone, "Why does she keep calling me that?"

He just stared at me blankly, as if I was missing something.

"Because you are her mother."

My breathing became ragged, and I started shaking my head. No.

"Bella, I don't know what's going on with you this morning, but these are your children" He gestured his hands in their direction,"And I'm..your husband. This is your home. We're married. We've been married for a while now."

That's when it dawned on me. These kids, they were so familiar because they looked like my best friend, Jacob. They had my eyes and the skin color of mine and Jacob's combined. We were together, we had kids, we were.. married. I went to reach for my ring on my left hand out of habit, but when I looked down to see that it wasn't my ring I placed my face into my hands and erupted in sobs. How could this be? Just yesterday I was in my room trying on my wedding dress. I was supposed to be.._marrying Edward soon_. Edward.

I squeezed my face harder into my hands, to check if this were all a dream and if I were sleeping.

Nothing. This wasn't a dream. I was still awake.

Jacob noticed my actions, and placed a hand on my back.

I realized that I had hurt Jacob once again, but I needed Edward right now, and I couldn't have him. I had somehow chosen Jacob long ago when I had the choice, and we had lived the life that Edward would have wanted for me, and the one that I had dreamed of once, but decided against it because Edward was my everything. I couldn't live without him. There was no going back, and I knew I would never see Edward again. He had probably gone to Volterra by now, seeing that I had chosen Jacob, unknowingly. And he probably saw it as my final decision because I didn't even go after him to stop him. This caused me to erupt in more sobs.

Jake sensed my need for solitude, so he stood up and walked towards the children. He stopped just beside the playground, making sure that they didn't fall, and smiled up to his children-- our children.

I twisted my body and crossed my arms on the armrest to cry on them. I couldn't take this away from Jacob, his happiness, his family. But if I had a choice, if I knew this would happen, I would have fought and fought for Edward, my Edward.

"Edward..." I whispered to nobody

"Ed..ward." I couldn't breathe anymore, and my mind was going black. I wanted to sleep and never wake up. If only this were a dream..

"Bella"

That voice. It was the most beautiful sound I have ever heard before, you couldn't compare it to any music, heck-- any instrument.

I realized that I was lying down on a bed now, but still in the position of my body being twisted and my arms crossed with my face pressed into them, except instead of on a swinging chair, I was in my room. Safely held in my angel's arms.

I was still crying and calling Edward's name. I opened my eyes, and when I took in my surroundings I released myself from my position and threw my arms around Edward's neck, taking him off guard, but he quickly retrieved himself and placed his arms around my waist. I breathed in his scent, which calmed me and reassured me of all my worries.

He leaned back, to wipe away the tears that had stained my cheeks from my dream, and when I saw his features in the dim light, I could see different emotions displayed on his face. Worry and saddness, but the one that struck me the most was pain.

I lifted my hand to cup his cheek, hoping that I would never see that emotion again on his beautiful face.

"What's wrong?" I croaked out

He composed his face, knowing that it hurt me to see him like that, but it only went away briefly.

"Bella.." he started, " do you regret.."

I cut him off quickly by placing my fingers to his lips.

I began to open my mouth, but closed it, not knowing how to put it.

"Listen to me, and listen to me closely. I do not regret anything that has to do with you Edward Cullen. You are my life. If I regretted it, I would be regretting my life as well, and I wouldn't be living so I wouldn't be here right now but I am, and I love you." I stated in one breath, letting it all out in the end.

He stared contentedly at me for a few moments and placed his fingers to my jaw and kissed my lips passionately, and all too soon he let go.

"You said some things though which really worried me." He said after a brief moment

I looked away from his gaze ashamed of my dream, and unsure of the things I had spoken in my sleep but aware that they had hurt Edward. I wanted to know what he heard, but at the same time I didn't want to hurt him.

As if he read my mind he added, " you said Jacob's name a lot and you said I miss you and mumbled a few things"

I cleared my throat before speaking so that my voice wouldn't fail me.

"I don't know why I had that dream.. it's just..." I tried to find the words

"Do you want to tell me what happened?"

I looked into his eyes and saw true sincerity. How did I deserve this?

"It was so real. I woke up in this unfamiliar house, I thought you were trying to surprise me again.." I smiled gently up at him, and he returned the smile.

"anyways, I walked around the house looking for you but couldn't find you. I go outside and there are these two kids playing on a little playground and they looked..." I bit my lip. I couldn't tell him how beautiful they looked, it would only pain him more to remember that we couldn't have kids of our own.

"well I kept trying to look for you until I gave up wondering if you were just waiting to surprise me. " I paused, " Until Jake came from inside the house. He sat beside me and I was so shocked. He looked older and more matured. I was confused, and I asked him where I was, where you were... "

He smiled at me to let me know that I should continue.

"Well, long story short. I found out about the life I would have had if I chose him.." I looked back to the first time I had this dream, of me and Jake being together. Me in my white sun dress, with our beautiful children. Why did I keep having this dream?

He bent his head in what I saw was hurt, as he probably pictured my dream as vividly as I had just dreamt it. He knew that I should have that life but he felt that he was 'selfish' to take it away from me.

"..but" he looked up trying to cover up his hurt, " the whole time, although it seemed all perfect, I was missing something. I was unhappy. The only thing that could have made me happy wasn't there. Which made me realize that, if I ever chose Jake... In real life, I know that I wouldn't be completely happy without you. That's why I kept calling your name."

He began to open his mouth but I cut him off quickly, I needed him to see me through this.

"So, I guess now I know why I had that dream," I looked into his eyes, as everything clicked in my head, "it wasn't to taunt me with regret, or to show me the life I could have had...but to show me the life I want to have instead of that one. With you."

We stared into eachother's eyes for what seemed like forever, until he bent down to kiss me. He didn't need to say anything, but somehow I knew that he was satisfied. He believed everything I told him because It was true. That dream was nothing but a boost of confidence for that upcoming day, where I would truly and eternally be with Edward. That was the life I wanted.

Our lips parted as he let me breathe in air, and regain consciousness. I could feel my exhaustion taking the better of me, but I was too afraid to go back to sleep and re-enter that dream. A little traitor yawn escaped my mouth and Edward chuckled lightly.

"Sleep, my Bella" he hugged me closer.

"I don't want to " I said stubbornly

He chuckled again, " and why is that my silly bella?"

I looked into his eyes for what seemed like an imeasurable amount of time until I found my answer.

"because why dream," I yawned "when I could have the real thing."

I saw him smile before my eyes failed me and the sound of my lullaby escaping his lips. For the rest of the night, I didn't dream. I just thought of the last thing I saw and that smile was enough to keep me sane for the night.

* * *

**Thanks for reading :) comment if you'd like.**


End file.
